one of the most beautiful endings in literature that I have ever read. It is also one of the most heartbreaking.

1965

Anne wished she hadn't allowed herself to be talked into giving this New Year's Eve party. She stared at the endless guests —they kept coming and going, crowding into the elevator and standing three deep at the bar. George and Lyon had pressured her into it, but giving a party was not as simple as going to one. You could always leave someone else's part. You were stuck with your own.

Celebrities from the Broadway shows began to arrive. It was past one, and she hadn't seen Lyon since their brief kiss at midnight. It was January first now, Jen's second birthday. She slipped away from everyone and walked down the hall to the nursery. The small night light picked out the dim outline of the sleeping child. "Happy New Year, angel," Anne whispered. "I love you...oh God, how I love you!" She leaned over and kissed the clean little brow, then quietly slipped out of the room. The living room was a wall of noise. The den was packed, too, and the bar was jammed. She went into her bedroom and closed the door. No, this was wrong —the hostess could not duck out. Besides, if she kept the door closed, someone would knock. It was rude. She opened the door and switched the lights off, no one could see her. She hoped they wouldn't come in. Her head was splitting.

She stretched out on the bed. The shrieks of laughter seemed far away, and the music...Somewhere she heard a glass crash... bursts of laughter... Suddenly she heard footsteps. O Lord, someone was coming. She'd say she just had to lie down. Two silhouettes came into the room. She lay quietly on the bed, hoping they would go.

"Let's close the door," the girl whispered.

"Nonsense. That would draw attention."

It was Lyon...but she could not distinguish the girl.

"I love you, Lyon." The voice sounded familiar.

"Oh, come now, you're just a baby."

"I don't care. I love you. My show was better than it's ever been last week because you personally supervised things."

His kiss silenced her.

"Lyon...will you be there every week?"

"I'll try."

"Not try — be there!" The voice was insistent. "Lyon, I'm one of the office's top properties..."

"Margie, are you trying to blackmail my love?" he said lightly.

"Is that what Neely O'Hara did?"

"There was never anything between Neely and me."

"Ha! Well, anyway, there's going to be plenty between us. God, I dig you!"

He kissed her again. "Now be a good girl. Let's get back to the party because we're missed."

Anne lay quietly until they were gone. Then she got up and straightened her dress. She went to the bathroom and took a red doll. Strangely enough, she felt no panic. Now it was Margie Parks...She found it didn't hurt as much this time. She still loved Lyon, but she loved him less. After Neely had gone he had been more devoted than ever. But there had been no sense of triumph. Something or some part of her had gone with Neely. She knew now there would always be a Neely, or a Margie...but each time it would hurt less, and afterward she would love Lyon less, until one day there would be nothing left — no hurt, and no love.

She brushed her hair and freshened her makeup. She looked fine. She had Lyon, her beautiful apartment, the beautiful child, the nice career of her own, New York — everything she had ever wanted. And from now on, she could never be hurt badly. She could always keep busy during the day, and at night — the lonely ones — there were always the beautiful dolls for company. She'd take two of the them tonight. Why not? After all, it was New Year's Eve!

-Jacqueline Susann , Valley of the Dolls